Jason Mraz

I re-discovered the gloriosity of Jason Mraz today. I sort of used him to get through my last breakup, and when he showed up on my "Heal" Jango mix I made at work, I sighed and settled my way back into a celebrity crush.

1. Who doesn't love videos with cheesy musical-like choreography?
2. His lyrics? So amazing.
3. He's from Virginia!
4. He moved to SAN DIEGO!
5. Um, his Website is HILARIOUS. Just go to it. I can't rely describe his perfect sense of humor ("You better better keep that ish wrapped up tight so you don't catch MEDIA" ha-ha).
6. NEW CELEBRITY CRUSH (since everyone rejected my crush on John Mayer, I guess he's too sketch-tastic now).

 

Size Matters

DearSugar had a poll the other day asking its readers if they preferred bulky boys or the skinny type, while today I read a New York Times article about the trend facing the fashion industry: increasingly thinning male models.

Coming from a girl who has dated on either extreme of the spectrum, I prefer something right in between (totally cliche, I know) too muscular and emo-boy skinny.

Looking at some of the weight-lifters in the gym even creep me out. Really? I'm glad they would be able to rescue their woman of choice, but I doubt a thousand-pound gorilla will be attacking their fair maiden any time soon. And the most muscular guy I've dated (and/or cared the most about how his muscles looked) was the most boring too.

This year I found myself in a weird trend of dating cross-country runners. Two weren't really that skinny (and had fantastic toned muscles), but the other was. And all I could think of when I was with him (and another skinny rockstar cigarette-smoking coffee-drinking "this is good for my image" type of guy I dated a few years back) was "Am I squishing him? Does he even find me feminine and attractive?"

When I polled some friends, of course the response was mixed:

"Really? I think it's gross. I prefer my boyfriend NOT to weigh less than me."

"I've never dated muscular guys. I prefer the skinny nerdy type."

"Well my boyfriend has a large frame, and he used to be obnoxiously skinny so it just looked WEIRD. Now he fits his frame better bug has some pudge. He says he's trying to work out more and I'm like GOOD. But I'm glad he's bigger than me."

It's like when I see a 5'1'' girl dating a 6'6'' guy - I get really angry and personally offended somehow. Leave the tall guys for the tall gals! - you can kind of just tell when a couple fits physically together. Maybe unfortunately the stereotype is that the men should be big enough to save us. So why is the fashion industry focusing on the measly male?

These Boys Explain Love Much Better Than I Ever Willl

Genius! And totally crush worthy. Mmm

Hi-larious Linkage

Living, uh, I mean working, in the blogosphere all day long, I have realized that I have laughed out loud to funny Web stuff less and less. But this Gawker posting about this New York Post article about a Cosmopolitan article had me covering my mouth and snickering - although my office pretty much encourages laughing out loud at all times.

So hey, why not add fuel to the online fire and spread the word?

Back to lame/weird/funny NYC boys later.

Boy-men

Knocked Up. It looked like a decent movie with a potentially slightly offensive (bold choice!) title. But then the critics started loving it. And now I can't wait to see it.

An excerpt from this New York Times article:

• "Mr. Apatow’s critique of contemporary mores is easy to miss — it is obscured as much by geniality as by profanity — but it is nonetheless severe and directed at the young men who make up the core of this film’s likely audience. The culture of sexual entitlement and compulsive consumption encourages men to remain boys, for whom women serve as bedmates and babysitters. Resistance requires the kind of quixotic heroism Steve Carell showed in “The 40-Year-Old Virgin” or a life-changing accident, like Alison’s serendipitous pregnancy."

Interestingly, we talked about this in one of my media classes two semesters ago. Movies like Punch-Drunk Love, About a Boy, and Bridget Jones' Diary are all about these boy-men who need strong women to take care of/fix them.


(I am one of those women! I want to take care of/fix boy-men! I am trying to not let this happen anymore.)

I tried to bring this point up in a random conversation I had with a guy in a park today. (I love random conversations!) But being a 30-something guy who actually initiates conversations, he did not understand the lame mamma's-boys that are plaguing my girl-power raised generation.

Unless... is girl power making men mamma's boys?

When we shun a guy who, in a vain attempt at being an adult, vaguely cat-calls us, are we turning down the only guy in the vicinity who is not a boy-man? Who is actually brave enough to initiate a dating-like situation? Or, are we properly not encouraging him to continue to be a sexist pig?

Ah, the 21st Century's (no no this isn't even that new. It must have started with the first suffragettes, I don't know) conundrum: girl power/equality, or actually manly men?

Types Part 2

My current (celebrity, totally unrealistic) crushes:

• Dane Cook
• Conan O'Brian (weird! I know...but the more I watch, the deeper I fall)
• Zach Braff (I've been watching "Scrubs" far too often. And every time I feel nostalgic/emotional at the end of the show)

I know there are a lot more. I don't know how they are possibly escaping my mind.

So, the trend you ask? They are all comedians. Loud, outgoing, borderline on the awkward (but embracing the awkward!) guys.

The other night a Conan rerun was on, and Eva Longoria was the guest host, and Conan was all flirtatious with her. And I was jealous. I mean, really. Jealous? Silly. Really, I've been watching too much TV.

I was telling my girlfriends last night about not-my-type-boy, and the way I described him was "Yeah, out of the two of us, I'm the funny one. I don't know if I like that."

"That's a shame," one responded.

"Yeah, I know!"

"...because you're not that funny!"

Yeah...I know. Thanksssss.

But hey, he's a nice guy.

But, hey! I'm in a whole new city now. And according to my equally adventurous soon-to-join-me friend, we will be finding New York City MEN, not boys.

Why my life is the exact opposite of Pink's "U+Ur Hand"

It's a catchy song. I even know a dance to it. You can find me attempting to belt the lyrics, but only in the privacy of my car with the volume knob cranked to the right.

On the other hand, it is awfully crass, and I generally don't approve of the use of "u" in place of "you," even when it saves space in a text. Plus, Pink is being awfully harsh to these boys! Other reasons why my life is the complete opposite of "U+Ur Hand:"

Check it out
Going out
On the late night
Looking tight
Feeling nice
It's a **** fight
I can tell
I just know
That it's going down
Tonight
At the door we don't wait cause we know them
At the bar six shots just beginning
That's when dick head put his hands on me
But you see

• Umm...we don't know them. Last time my girlfriends and I went into DC, we totally lucked out because we got valet parked right in front of the building and although it was raining, we got a spot in line underneath the awning. One of the bouncers asked us, "Are you on the guest list?" Uhh..no. How do you get on the guest list you ask? You sign up online. Fabulous. We really must do our sophisticated research.
• Six shots? Really, Pink, isn't that a little much? Anyway, I'm the last of my friends to turn 21.
  

Midnight
I'm drunk
I don't give a ***k
Wanna dance
By myself
Guess you're outta luck
Don't touch
Back up
I'm not the one
Buh bye
Listen up it's just not happening
You can say what you want to your boyfriends
Just let me have my fun tonight
Aiight

• Please see age requirements, above.
• I do not mind for one second dancing by myself. In fact, I can be a lot more creative and have a lot more fun. But, Pink, if you really want to dance by yourself and only yourself, do it in your bedroom. I'm sure you have a fabulously-sized one with your own personal ballet barre and wall mirrors.

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight

• I enjoy entertaining. Is this a bad thing?
• I would not be able to fight anyone or anything. In the middle of my high school graduation season, I got a call from a Marine recruiter. Instead of being ruthless and saying "not interested!" and hanging up as quickly as possible, I had an actual conversation with the guy. I admitted to him that even if somone gave me a gun and told me "you have to shoot this humanoid alien, or else he will kill you," I still don't think I could pull the trigger. It's hard enough for me to pick up a weapon even in a video game! Back in elementary school (I don't know how I remember this!) I had a dream that one of the guys in my class was being mean to me or something. I couldn't push him away. Luckily, my best friend at the time came over and kicked him in the balls for me. But seriously, how lame is that, that I couldn't even hurt a meanie in a dream?
• I may have been fine before you walked into my life, but who said it can't get better? Or be filled with more fun?
• And...that's just awkward. Sorry boys.

Sorry Pink? Does this make me a push-over? Or whatever the opposite of a feminist is? Ah well. I like boys. Just non-creepy clubbing ones, if you please.